It’s not so much that I need to know what to do; it’s that I need to do what I know.

The title is from https://i-m-4-u.com/2013/07/14/forgiving-can-be-tough/ and captures part of my struggle.  The other part is that I definitely need to know more.  And yet the two are intertwined.

God will not give me more instruction if I am not doing what he has already given me.  If I want to know more I have to actually do more of what he has already said .  That's the hard part.

Or is it?  I have the most fun when I am obeying God.

I think for me it is the process of deciding to obey God that is the toughest part.  I have to risk, and trust Him that what I don't want to do now is exactly what I will be glad I did later.  Many times I feel alone when deciding.  (This may be why I need to be part of a small group).  No matter what help I have, it is in the end my decision.  And if I want to know more, if I want to experience Jesus closer to me, I must obey Him.